Anything Goes
Cole Porter (1934)

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Times have changed
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And we've often rewound the clock
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Since the Puritans got a shock
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When they landed on Plymouth Rock.

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If today, any shock they should try to stem
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'Stead of landing on Plymouth Rock,
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Plymouth Rock would land on them.

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In olden days, a glimpse of stocking
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Was looked on as something shocking.
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But now, God knows,
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Anything goes.

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Good authors too who once knew better words
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Now only use four-letter words
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writing prose.
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Anything goes.

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If driving fast cars you like, if low bars you like,
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If old hymns you like, if bare limbs you like,
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If Mae West you like, or me undressed you like,
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Why, nobody will oppose.

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When ev'ry night the set that's smart is in-
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truding in nudist parties
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in studios.
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Anything goes.

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When Missus Ned McLean (God bless her)
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Can get Russian reds to "yes" her,
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Then I suppose
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Anything goes.

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When Rockefeller still can hoard en-
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Ough money to let Max Gordon
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Produce his shows,
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Anything goes.

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The world has gone mad today, and good's bad today,
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And black's white today, and day's night today,
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And that gent today, you gave a cent today
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Once had several chateaux.

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When folks who still can ride in Jitneys
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Find out Vanderbilts and Whitneys
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Lack baby clo'es,
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Anything goes.

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When Sam Goldwyn can with great conviction
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Instruct Anna Sten in diction,
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Then Anna shows
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Anything goes.

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When you hear that Lady Mendl standing up
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Now does a handspring landing up-
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On her toes,
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Anything goes.

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Just think of those shocks you've got, and those knocks you've got
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And those blues you've got, from those news you've got
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And those pains you've got, (If any brains you've got)
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From those little radios.

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So Missus R, with all her trimmin's,
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Can broadcast a bed from Simmons
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'Cause Franklin knows
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Anything goes.
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