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I know there's never been a man in the awful shape I'm in 
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I can't even spell my name, my heads in such a spin 
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I tried to eat a steak with a big old tablespoon 
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You got me chasin' rabbits, walkin' on my hands and howlin' at the moon 
  
 
Well, I took one look at you and it almost drove me mad 
And then I even went and lost what little sense I had 
Now I can't tell the day from night, I'm crazy as a loon 
You got me chasin' rabbits, pullin' out my hair and howlin' at the moon 
  
Some friends of mine asked me to go out on a huntin' spree 
'Cause there ain't a hound dog in this state that can hold a light to me 
I ate three bones for dinner today, then I treed a coon 
You got me chasin' rabbits, scratchin on fleas and howlin' at the moon 
  
I rode my horse to town today and a gas pump we did pass 
I pulled 'em up and I hollered WHOA!, said fill him up with gas 
The man picked up a monkey wrench and WHAM!, he changed my tune 
You got me chasin' rabbits, spittin out teeth and howlin' at the moon 
  
I never thought in this old world a fool could fall so hard 
But honey baby, when I fell the whole world must have jarred 
Now I think I'd quit my doggish ways if you'd take me for your groom 
You got me chasin' rabbits, pickin' out rings and howlin' at the moon