Alrighty, this is my first tab so go easy on me. A (x02220@1) EIt (022100@1)was late at night on Christmas eve A (x02220@1) EI (022100@1)was dreaming of the soft white snow A (x02220@1) EI (022100@1)was awoken by a noise near the Christmas tree A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) D (xx0232@1) E (022100@1) AWhat (x02220@1)it was I did not know A (x02220@1) EIt (022100@1)was Santa Clause he was bringing me some gifts A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) Unfortunately I did not know that A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) So I quietly snuck up behind him A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) D (xx0232@1) E (022100@1) AAnd (x02220@1)I shot him five times in the back A (x02220@1) A (x02220@1) AIt (x02220@1)went Pow pow pow pow pow A (x02220@1) A (x02220@1) AHe (x02220@1)said "what the fuck ow ow ow" A (x02220@1) A (x02220@1) A (x02220@1) AThen (x02220@1)I shot him three more times in the head A (x02220@1) A (x02220@1) D (xx0232@1) EPieces (022100@1)of his brain flew out and he was dead A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) That's when I noticed his blood-soaked beard A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) And his red suit filled with bullet holes A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) I said "oh my god I killed santa clause A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) D (xx0232@1) E (022100@1) AI'm (x02220@1)not going to jail for this asshole" A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) So I went to my shed and I got my saw A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) And I started to choppipty chop chop A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) I started with his arms then his legs then his head A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) D (xx0232@1) E (022100@1) AAnd (x02220@1)then the torso was a really long job A (x02220@1) A (x02220@1) And the blood went spurt spurt spurt A (x02220@1) A (x02220@1) AIt (x02220@1)was really hard work work work A (x02220@1) A (x02220@1) A (x02220@1)It was hard cutting through his spine A (x02220@1) A (x02220@1) D (xx0232@1) E (022100@1) I must have vomited sixteen times A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) I burnt all the pieces in my fireplace A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) The smell of burning human flesh filled my nose A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) Eleven hours later there was nothing left A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) D (xx0232@1) E (022100@1) A (x02220@1) And that's when I heard my telephone A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) It was Auntie Jean looking for Uncle Bob A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) She said "He left the house dressed as Santa Clause A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) But he didn't come home last night A (x02220@1) E (022100@1) D (xx0232@1) E (022100@1) AHave (x02220@1)you seen him god I hope he's alright"