The following is a heartfelt message to all my friends and family:

A...

A...                        D.           A.
  I know you think of me as someone to rely on,
A...                       E...
  A helping hand or just a shoulder to cry on,
F#m...
  Though I'm glad you feel that way,
        Bm.                A.
There's something I should say:
    E...
I'm afraid I won't be there for you
Bm.. -stop
    This Saturday.

'Cause ...

Em..                               F#m
Call me during Doctor Who and I'll KILL you,
Em..                              F#m
Leave me in peace if you wanna survive,
Em..                                    F#m
As far as you're concerned I'm incommunicado,
C     D        E7 -stop     A...
Seven pm 'till seven forty-five.

A...                  D.             A.
  I'm all yours again    come Sunday morning,
A...                       E...
  Although my conversation may be rather boring,
F#m...                           Bm.            A.
All week long I swear I'll be as helpful as can be,
    E...                                 Bm.. -stop
But Saturday night you'd better stay the heck away from me.

'Cause ...

Em..                               F#m
Call me during Doctor Who and I'll KILL you,
Em..                                F#m
Sixteen years I've been waiting for this,
Em..                               F#m
Call me during Doctor Who and I'll KILL you,
C          D           E7 -stop
Don't even think about ringing just to take the -

Em..                               F#m
Call me during Doctor Who and I'll KILL you,
Em..                                  F#m
I'm not kidding, look me right in the face,
Em..                               F#m
Call me during Doctor Who and I'll KILL you,
C        D       E7-stop            A...
Saturday night I need some time and space.