The Chaser's 'Eulogy' Song - (highly offensive)
Music by Andrew Hansen
Words by Chris Taylor
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Here's the chords to that controversial song performed on the Chaser's War On Everything 
the play Dead Caesar.
Tabbed by Bert.
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Playing Notes:
During the song there are many spoken parts which can't be placed into timing with the 
so I've only written down the chords played during these parts
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D7 - (Spoken part)
My great grand father died this week.
I couldn?t stand him actually nobody could.
But as soon as he passed away everybody went around saying what a top bloke he was, so..
I?d like to dedicate this song to you, 'Gramps'.

       G            Em
He was very hard of hearing,
       G            Em
he was dull and domineering,
G          Em               D
misogynist cantankerous and vain.
           C            D
He hit the bottle every night,
          G              Em
he hit my grandma out of spite,
          C                                D
and those stories about his bunions were a pain.
    C                 D
But all that?s now forgotten,
        G              Em
once he took his final breath.
         C                D                G
Yes even pricks turn into top blokes after death.

C D G Em - (Spoken part)
You don?t believe me?
C D - (Spoken part)
Allow me to furnish you with a few examples..

      G              Em
Steve Irwin lived in khaki,
  G           Em
a cartoon kamikaze,
    G                 Em                D
who taunted crocs and talked so frequently.

    C               D
And Brocky was some revhead,
    G                        Em
who pumped the air with pure lead,
   C                          D
so anti green he drove into a tree.

    C               D
But all that was forgotten,
          G                Em
once they took their final breath.
         C               D                G
Yes even tools turn into top blokes after death.

     G                Em
John Lennon chose the hippy life,
   G                       Em
he chose some nutbag for a wife,
    G                    Em               D
and his songs were never quite as good as Paul?s.

     C                  D
Jeff Buckley fooled all lovers,
         G             Em
just one album, mostly covers,
     C                               D
more wailing than Japan does off our shores.

    C               D
But all that was forgotten,
        G              Em
once he took his final breath,
         C                 D                G
yes even wankers turn into top blokes after death.

         G             Em
Princess Di was just a slut for sex,
     G                  Em
when they looked in the car wreck,
    G                  Em           D
her dress was wet with Arab's semen stain.

     C             D
Stan Zemanek was a racist jock,
  G         Em
a fatso xenophobic cock,
      C                                  D
whose views were more malignant than his brain.

    C            D
But all that was forgotten,
     G                 Em
once he took his final breath,
         C                   D                G
yes even arseholes turn into top blokes after death.

C D G Em - (spoken part)
It?s not how they lived that counts,
but how we rewrite the book.

C D - (spoken part)
When it comes to truth it?s best to use restraint,

C D G Em - (spoken part)
It pays to throw away the facts
and have a rose coloured look.

C D - (spoken part)
When he dies, Martin Bryant will look a saint.

    G             Em
Don Bradman was a total farce,
  G              Em
a grumpy, greedy tired-arse,
    G                       Em               D
who couldn?t even score one run last time he played.

      C            D
Kerry Packer was a brothel chief,
  G               Em
a tax cheat and a kidney thief.
    C                                          D
and procreating Jamie was the worst mistake he made.

    C            D
But all that was forgotten,
        G              Em
once he took his final breath,
         C                         D                G
yes even **** (censored) turn into top blokes after death.

        G
Belinda Emmett was a?  (stopped by cast)

         C              D
Remember all will be forgotten,
        G              Em
once we take our final breath..
         C
yes even pervert motherf**kers,
     C
even rampant child-abusers,
     C
even local Baghdad looters,
     C
even baby bunny rooters,
     C
even reckless drunken drivers,
     C
even rodent sperm imbibers,
     C
even violent poofter bashers,
     C
even public penis flashers,
     C
even rotting corpse molesters,
     C
even human piss ingesters,
     C
even tiny kitten kickers,
     C
even anal finger lickers,
     G             Em
even Anna ?bloody? Coren,
         C             D               G
yes even she will be a top bloke after death.
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The Chaser's War On Everything:
http://abc.net.au/tv/chaser/war/
The Chaser's MySpace:
http://www.myspace.com/chaserteam