Intro: (Barre) E5 D5 (power chord) C5 G5 G5 C5 G5 (D?ne quickly) I used to be a dead guy G5 C5 G5 (done quickly Now I'm a fuckin' Jedi E5 D5 And I've got lots of news for you E5 D5 C5 And I've got a long list of things to do G5 C5 G5 (D?ne quickly) I used to dwell on the present G5 C5 G5 (D?ne quickly) I used to be so Hesitant E5 D5 But now I've got my whole life to live E5 D5 A5 C5 (staccato) And I've got all my love to give to all you fuckers that I hayayate G5 C5 G5 It's like the Gift of the Magi G5 C5 G5 It's like the Gift of the Magi 2! E5 D5 You sold your soul to buy some tits E5 D5 I sold my soul to grow a diiiiiiick G5 C5 G5 We've gotta get him in the van G5 C5 G5 What if he resists? E5 D5 Kick him in the back of the fuckin' head E5 D5 Put him in the back of the fuckin' Vayayayan G5 C5 G5 It's a miracle of science, G5 C5 G5 This portrayal of violence E5 D5 It lives inside us all E5 D5 it lives inside our hearts A5 C5 (staccato) Just like a stupid fucking tape wooooorm Play into Who can we blame? G5 C5 G5 The husband divorced his wife G5 C5 G5 after she cut her hair E5 D5 because she was way less fuckable E5 D5 And that's just unforgiveable G5 C5 G5 Moved into a condo G5 C5 G5 and hung out by the POOOL E5 D5 He never wore a bathing suit E5 D5 Because he wanted scope out the talent G5 C5 G5 If god doesn't like ugly G5 C5 G5 He does't like anybody E5 D5 Fuck god anyway E5 D5 He's osbsolete A5 C5 (staccato) My god thinks my jokes are funny Intro There is no one to blame People are just fuckin' mean GO ?SONS?