(Verse)
A5                               E5
I don't believe this we've been friends for so long
                F#5
It's so hard to see
     D5
That you did this to me
A5                             E5
You came round asking just to mow the garden
                F#5  
You're a clever guy
     D5
'Cos you did it for free - It's funny
F#5               E5       D5    (silent)
You think I don't already know

(Chorus)
         A5      E5
What if I, told you
    F#5      D5
I'm watching you
A5                 E5
I've seen you two at the movies
F#5          D5           (silent)
And alone in my jacuzzi's
A5      E5
You're screwed
        F#5       D5
And I'm done with you
A5                   E5
Stay well clear and leave my mum alone 
F#5                 D5
leave my mum alone, mum alone, mum alone 

(Verse)
A5                            E5
I came home and your car was in the front yard
          F#5           D5
I went to see, what the f**k was going on - only
A5                          E5
I didn't ever think things could be so wrong
                  F#5              D5
You unzipped your flies, and now I can't believe my eyes
F#5               E5       D5   (silent)
You think I don't already know

(Chorus)
         A5      E5
What if I, told you
    F#5      D5
I'm watching you
A5                 E5
I've seen you two at the movies
F#5          D5           (silent)
And alone in my jacuzzi's
A5      E5
You're screwed
        F#5       D5
And I'm done with you
A5                   E5
Stay well clear and leave my mum alone
F#5                 D5
Leave my mum alone, mum alone, mum alone

(Bridge)
              A5          E5
You did it to Steven and Ethan
F#5      D5
Joey and Nathan
A5         E5
Josie and David
F#5             D5
Peter, John and Mike
A5                 E5
Alison, Alistair, Monica McKalister
F#5                D5
Madison, Harrison, and the guy from Travison's
F#5              E5       D5   (silent)
If so they don't already know

(Chorus)
         A5      E5 
What if I, told you
     F#5      D5
They all hate you
A5            E5
I don't care about the movies
F#5           D5
Or you two in my jacuzzi's
A5      E5
You're screwed
        F#5       D5
And I'm done with you
A5                   E5
Stay well clear and leave my mum alone
F#5                 D5
Leave my mum alone, mum alone, mum alone

Repeat chorus once