E5                           B5                 E5
As I camped out one evening to take the midnight air
                               A5              B5
I heard a maiden grieving from somewhere over there
    A5             E5             A5                E5
Who is it you are mourning; for whom do you wear grey?
    A5               E5          F#5                B5
She said I pine for no one - I just can't pay my way.
     A5                    E5         B5            E5
Ever since the chattering classes invaded Hebden Bridge
    A5                   E5                  F#5                  B5
And priced the likes of me and mine to the pots of the Pennine Ridge
   A5                      E5                  A5             E5
To South East Wales I was forced to flee and now I have no job
                       A5          B5                     E5
That's why tonight I'm sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob.

                              B5                E5
For you I'd waive expenses to try and help you out
                               A5              B5
For your beauty influences the landscape hereabouts
     A5                  E5               A5                   E5
Look up my betrothed at Three Cocks; be sure she'll see you right
      A5          E5             F#5                B5
While I go up to Yorkshire and there avenge your plight.
     A5                      E5                 B5                     E5
Soon reports were filtering through to me the pair were drowning in bliss
  A5                   E5            F#5                B5
I can't recall having ever been cuckolded quite like this
  A5              E5                  A5
I gave up hope ironically for Lent,
     E5                  A5         B5                   E5
Come see me living in a bivvie if you're ever up Pen-Y-Ghent.

                              B5             E5
Although upon reflection I've been a trifle green
                                A5                 B5
I still think with affection on everything that's been
      A5                E5        A5                     E5
So prepare that fatted calf and string up the bunting gay
     A5               E5            F#5            B5
Your brisk and bonny ploughboy is coming home today.
      E5                         B5                      E5     B5
And tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob.
  E5                         B5                      E5     B5
Tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob.

   E5                       B5
On touching the trig point I found my thrill
       E5                               B5
To the east Brokeback Mountain, to the west Benny Hill
     E5                           B5
I'll give you the grid ref - you might like to go:
E5    B5
SO2 24350.
E5                           B5     
Could this be heaven, would that be the Severn?
E5                      B5
Twampa, Twampa, you're gonna need a jumper,
   E5                    B5                      E5      B5
It gets a bit chilly on top of Lord Hereford's Knob.
  E5                         B5                      E5
Tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob.
B5                         E5
All of our songs sound the same;
                            B5                     E5
Tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob.
    B5                    E5
I'm keeping two chevrons apart;
                            B5                     E5
Tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob.
           B5                  E5
You're the reason why paradise lost;
                            B5                     E5
Tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob.