D5
My first crush on an Irish girl,
I was ten years old
And her name was Elaine.
Little red-head girl;
Well, she looked like you,
But if you were ten.
                     B5
Which you?re clearly not.
              G5
Not that you look old,
                   Em11
But you get my...
I?ll just stop now.
D5
Okay, wait, ?cause I had a point -
No, I swear I did!
Well, I think I did,
                   B5
Which is all my life
               B5
(Or since I was ten)
          B5 
I have had a yen
B5      Em11
For an Irish lass.
                     C5
Because God knows why,
             G5
Like the ancient curse
            D5
Of the shiksa queens.


Do I talk too much?

                  B5
Which is not to say
             B5
That I?d want Elaine,
                        B5
Who turned out to be
                   B5
(When I last checked in)
        B5
A5 Republican
          D5
And a parapsychologist.


F5                     Bb5        C5
If you?ve got a four-leaf clover,
F5
You can make my dreams come true.
I will be your Hebrew slave:
       C#5                       Eb5          F5
Just do the things that Irish girls do.
Talk about potato famines,
I begin to cry on cue!
Eb5
Sing about the Emerald Isle and
Ab5
Get your Irish eyes to smilin? -
C#5                                               D5
I could be in love with someone like you.

D5
I just left a relationship
With a lovely girl 
Named Alyssa Levine.
She was really great,
It was all my fault -
I just got upset
?Cause she slept with my brother.

       B5
So I made a vow
                 B5
Not to get caught up
          B5
In the dating scene
                     B5
Or the whole routine
               B5
With the cousin?s friend
                   B5
Or the who-knows-what,
                         B5
Like I need that shit.
             D5
I?ve got marks to make,
             D5
I?ve got steps to climb,
            D5
It?s the perfect time!
                       D5
I?ve got books to write,
                       D5
I?ve got things to do -
              D5
I go out my door
                 D5
And bump into you,
                   D5
And the jig is up,
             D5
And my vow is through!
           D5                G5
I don?t know what I?m coin?,
       D5          Em11
But come in and ruin me!


F5                            Bb5    C5
I will write my own ?Ulysses?
F5
If you?re there to show me how.
Take me back to Glocca Morra,
C#5                           Eb5            F5
Bathe me in the River Shannon now.
If you?ll be Mrs. O?Leary,
Baby, I will be your cow.
Eb5
I?ll deliver shamrocks daily,
Ab5
Buy your pa a new shillelagh,
C#5
I could be in love with someone like...


Eb5                                Ab5
You could be my inspiration
                                 Eb5
And get me past this block,
                                        Ebaug
And walk me through the Great Unknown.
Eb5                                    Ab5
You could be my true salvation,
                                     Eb5
Unchain me from this rock,
                                           Cb2
And keep me from being alone,
?Cause I?m no good at being alone!


F5                   Bb5       C5
Take me to another level!
F5
Let me play in bigger halls!
I will do a Riverdance
C#5                                         Eb5          F5
As long as you keep answering my calls!
Get me out of my apartment!
Keep me from my empty walls!
Eb5
Someone hire John McCormack!
                                         Cb7
Start the Wearing of the Green!
Ab5
Let me win the Irish Sweepstakes!
                                                    C#5
Let me take you home, Kathleen!
I can be in love with someone!
I can be in love with someone!
C#5
I can be in love with
Db6add9
Someone
Cm7b9  C7b9
Like 
F5
you!