TRANSCRIBER: Matt Kimmel 

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D         F#                          Bm
Who knows what the wind's gonna bring when the invalids sing
D       F#                           Bm                    D
La La's with a powerful sting that'd stop any opera or any Bing
G     Bm               A
Sing, spread the news across the land:
G   C               F    G
All winners will be also-rans

D      F#            Bm
Achoo--One size fits everyone
D      F#              Bm
Achoo--One breath, the deed has been done

D         F#                               Bm
Grey hair and a dash and a flair give your doctor an air
D         F#                            Bm                               D
I'm hurt, but the choice you made is an obvious one for a girl who needs care
G Bm              A
I do hope that he makes you well
G    C            F        G
Say, is there any cure for Hell?

D      F#            Bm
Achoo--One size fits everyone
D      F#              Bm
Achoo--One breath, the deed has been done

G     Bm                A
Sing, Ill de France and everywhere
G   C                 F       G
You can't ignore that kind of air

D      F#            Bm
Achoo--One size fits everyone
D      F#              Bm
Achoo--One breath, the deed has been done

G   D                                               F#       Bm           A
So, open wide, open wide and say, open wide and say goodbye, you'll be OK

D      F#         Bm
Achoo--He's gonna whisk you away
D      F#         Bm
Achoo--He's gonna make you OK

etc.