G5 , D5 , G5 , D5 , etc... Well, I went down to Mos Eisley for a converter G5 D5 Hell, ya know how hot it gets on Tatooine G5 D5 Well then I saw that there cantina G5 C5 D5 I'll go in for an Orangina G5 C5 I heard it was rough but how bad could it be? D5 C5 G5 Well I walked through the door and the music stopped--dead G5 D5 G5 All manner of man and beasts were starin' at me G5 D5 G5 Seems just one week before their Twi'lek slave girl walked out the door C5 D5 G5 C5 And I guess I was the next best thing they'd seen D5 C5 G5 I lost more than my heart in that cantina G5 D5 G5 I left my manhood there on Tatooine C5 D5 G5 Son, it don't mean you're weak if you turn the other cheek C5 D5 G5 C5 But if you spread 'em both for Jabba, son, you ain't a man! D5 C5 G5 I was hit over the head by ol' Han Solo I'da never guessed that pirate was a homo I woke up next to Chewbacca I was smeared in Wookie caca And what they did to my poor nipples was a no-no! Ol' Greedo greedily grabbed his green weenie And he yanked that sucker til it wasn't so teenie He pulled me into Jabba's hut He stared intently at my butt And then he oota-toota'ed me with his zucchini I lost more than my heart in that cantina I left my manhood there on Tatooine Son, it don't mean you're weak if you turn the other cheek But if you spread 'em both for Jabba, son, you ain't a man! Well, a guy walked up and said "My friend doesn't like you." I said 'Sorry.' He said 'I don't like you either, you better watch your self!' - I think his name was Tom Waits And then some old dude who taught Vader Chopped his arm off with a sabre That later made for one red hot anal invader - owwwww I was broken on the floor beat to a stupor Then I was saved! There at the door were 10 storm troopers! But then my hope faded away, I didn't know they cloned 'em gay And they each took turns storm troopin' me in the pooper I lost more than my heart in that cantina I left my manhood there on Tatooine Son, it don't mean you're weak if you turn the other cheek Which is why I still go there every week!