"Thank You God" by Tim Minchin

Tuning: Standard

Odd chords (in order of appearance):

Cadd4: x-3-3-0-1-0
Bb: x-1-3-3-3-1
C7: x-3-2-3-1-0
Fdim7: 1-x-0-1-0-1
Cdim7: x-0-1-2-1-2
G#: 4-6-6-5-4-4

F                    C
I have an apology to make,
                           Dm
I'm afraid I've made a big mistake,
                           Cadd4 C
I turned my face away from You, Lord.
F                           C
I was too blind to see the light,
                            Dm
I was too weak to feel your might,
                                     Cadd4  C
I closed my eyes, I couldn't see the truth, Lord.

E                                  Am
But then like Saul on the Damascus road,
E                               Am
You sent a messenger to me, and so,
       F
I have had the truth revealed to me,
            Em
Please forgive me all those things I said,
     F
I'll no longer betray you, Lord,
       G
I will pray to you instead.

               Bb         F          C
And I will say thank you, thank you, thank you God.
Bb         F          C
Thank you, thank you, thank you God.

C                                       G
Thank you God, for fixing the cataracts of Sam's mum.

I had no idea but it's suddenly so clear,
      C                           C7
Now I feel such a cynic how could I have been so dumb?
F
Thank you for displaying how praying works,
     C
A particular prayer in a particular church,
D                                                  G
Thank you Sam, for the chance to acknowledge this omnipotent ophthalmologist.

C                                       G
Thank you God, for fixing the cataracts of Sam's mum.

I didn't realise that it was so simple,
           C                             C7
But you've shown a great example of just how it can be done,
    F
You only need to pray in a particular spot,
         C
To a particular version of a particular god,
           D
And if you pull that off without a hitch,
        G
He will fix one eye of one middle-class white bitch.

  Am                  Fdim7
I know in the past my outlook has been limited,
  Am                              Fdim7
I couldn't see examples of where life had been divinitive,
    F                       C
But I can admit it when the evidence is clear,
   D                      G
As clear as Sam's mum's new cornea.

That's extremely clear!
Extremely clear!

C                                       G
Thank you God, for fixing the cataracts of Sam's mum.

I have to admit that in the past I have been skeptical,
    C                              C7
But Sam described this miracle and I am overcome.
    F
How fitting that the sighting of a sight-based intervention,
       C
Should open my eyes to this exciting new dimension.
          D
It's like someone put an eye chart on the wall in front of me,
        G
And the top five letters say I-C-G-O-D.

C                                                   G
Thank you Sam, for showing how my point of view has been so flawed.

I assumed there was no God at all but now I see that's cynical,
     C                                   C7
It's simply that His interests aren't particularly broad.
     F
He's largely undiverted by the starving masses,
       C
Or the inequality between the various classes.
   D
He gives out strictly limited passes,
    G
Redeemable for surgery or two-for-one glasses.

  Am                      Fdim7
I feel so shocking for historically mocking.
         Am                       Fdim7
No, your interests are clearly confined to the ocular.
  F                              C
I bet given the chance you'd eschew the divine,
    D                               G
And start a little business selling contacts online.

C                                      G
Fuck me Sam, what are the odds that of history's endless parade of gods,
                                                                    C           
      C7
That the god that you just happen to be taught to believe in is the actual one and he 
digs on healing,
    F                                           C
But not the AIDS-ridden African nations, or the victims of the plague, or the 
flood-addled Asians,
    D                                            G
But healthy, privately-insured Australians, with common and curable corneal degeneration?

     Am                        Fdim7
This story of Sam's has but a single explanation:
  Am                       Fdim7
A surgical god who digs on magic operations.
      Am                        Fdim7
No it couldn't be mistaken attribution of causation,
Am                     Fdim7
Born of a coincidental temporal correlation,
  Am                     Fdim7
Exacerbated by a general lack of education,
Am                         Fdim7
Vis-a-vis physics in Sam's parish congregation.
       F                                C
And it couldn't be that all these pious people are liars.
   F                          C
It couldn't be an artifact of confirmation bias.
  F
A product of group-think,
  Cdim7
A mass delusion,
   G                           Fdim7
An Emperor's-New-Clothes-style fear of exclusion.
        Am                     Fdim7
No it's more likely to be an all-powerful magician,
         Am                    Fdim7
Than the misdiagnosis of the initial condition,
   Am                       Fdim7
Or one of many cases of spontaneous remission,
     Am                           Fdim7
Or a record-keeping glitch by the local physician.

        F                    C
No, the only explanation for Sam's mum seeing:
     F                        C
They prayed to an all-knowing super-being.
       F                         Cdim7
To the omnipresent master of the universe,
       G                        Fdim7
And he liked the sound of their muttered verse.
         Am                       G
So for a bit of a change from his usual stunt,
           F               Em
Of being a sexist, racist, murderous cunt,
   F                            Em
He popped down to Dandenong and just like that,
F                  Cdim7
Used his powers to heal the cataracts,
G        G#
Of Sam's mum.
   A
Of Sam's mum.

-KEY CHANGE-

D                                       A
Thank you God, for fixing the cataracts of Sam's mum.

I didn't realise that it was such a simple thing.
  D
I feel such a ding-a-ling, what an ignorant scum.
G
Now I understand how prayer can work,
     D
A particular prayer in a particular church,
         G
In a particular style, with the particular stuff,
           D
And for particular problems that aren't particularly tough,
            G
And for particular people, preferably white,
           D
And for particular senses, preferably sight,
      G
A particular prayer in a particular spot,
        Fdim7
To a particular version of a particular god.
           A
And if you get that right, he just might,
G
Take a break from giving babies malaria,
    D
And pop down to your local area,
   E                 A       D
To fix the cataracts of your mum.
            A   D
Hallelujah!
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