The Professor (Live at Cornucopia Caf?, Dublin) 

capo 3 
             C5 
Well I don't know if I'm wrong  
            B5  
Cause she's only just gone  
A5                     G5  
   Here's to another relationship  
(hammers on 2nd fret of D5 string on the word "bombed") 

          F5                  ( E5 ) 
Bombed by excellent breed of gamete disease 
    F5                        G5 
I'm sure when I'm older I'll know what that means 

(same as first time) 

Cried when she should and she laughed when she could 

Here's to the man with his face in the mud  

And an overcast play just taken away  

From the lover's in love at the centre of stage yeah 
F5 
Loving is fine if you have plenty of time 
    G5 
For walking on stilts at the edge of your mind 
F5 
Loving is good if your dick's made of wood  
        G5 
And the dick left inside only half understood her 
F5 
What makes her come and what makes her stay?  
G5 
  What make the animal run, run away yeah 
F5 
What makes him stall, what makes him stand 
    G5 
And what shakes the elephant now 
    (mute) 
And what makes a man? 
F5         G5            A5 (?) 
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know 
A5 G5   F5 G5     C5 
No I don't know you any more 
C5 C5 F5 
No, no, no, no... 
C5           F5 
ooh yeah... hey hey... 

same as first time, except sub 
E5 for B5  

I don't know if I'm wrong 
'Cause shes only just gone 
Why the *** is this day taking so long 
I was a lover of time and once she was mine 
I was a lover indeed, I was covered in weed  
Cried when she should and she laughed when she could 
Well closer to god is the one who's in love  
And I walk away cause I can 
Too many options may kill a man 
Loving is fine if it's not in your mind 
But I've ***ed it up now, too many times 
Loving is good if it's not understood 
Yeah, but I'm the professor  
And feel that I should know 
What makes her come and what makes her stay? 
What make the animal run, run away and 
What makes him tick apart from him prick  
And the lonelier side of the jealousy stick 
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know 
No I don't know, I don't know, I don't know 
No I don't know, I don't know, I don't know 
Hell I don't know you any more 
No, no, no no... 

Well I don't know if I'm wrong 
'Cause she's only just gone  
Here's to another relationship  
Bombed by my excellent breed of gamete disease 
I finished it off with some French wine and cheese 

La fille danse 
Quand elle joue avec moi 
Et je pense que je l'aime des fois 
Le silence, n'ose pas dis-donc 
Quand on est ensemble 
Mettre les mots 
Sur la petite dodo