-##
From: c_caddy@oz.plymouth.edu (Clayton S. Caddy)

AWAKE: Dream Theatre

6:00

Six o'clock and a siren kicks him from a dream
Tries to shake it off but it just won't stop
Can't find the strength but he's got promises to keep
And wood to chop before he sleeps
I may never get over
but never's better than now
I've got bases to cover
He's in the parking lot
just sitting in his car
I'ts nine o'clock but he can't get out
He lights a cigarette
and turns the music down
but he just can't seem to shake that sound
Once I thought I'd get over
but it's too late for me now
I've got bases to cover
Melody walks through the door
and memory flies out the window
and nobody knows what they want
'til they finally let it all go
The pain outside
coming inside
So many ways to drown a man
So many ways to drag him down
Some are fast and some take years and years
Can't hear what he's saying when he's talking in his sleep
Finally found the sound but he's in to deep
I could never get over
Is it to late for me now?
Feel like I'm blowing my cover
Melody walks through the door
and memory flies out the window
and nobody knows what they want
'til they finally let it all go
But don't cut your losses too soon
'cause you'll only be cutting your own throat
And answer a call while you still hear at all
'cause nobody will if you won't

CAUGHT IN A WEB

Silence disguised
I watch you
Show me the hurt
that haunts you
Would you despise the thrill
If all you hide were mine?
I can't hold on any longer
These feelings keep growing stronger
Echoes that deafen the mind
Will bury my voice in their wake
Caught in a Web
Removed from the world
Hanging on by a thread
Sinning the lies
devised in my head
I've seen the path
the one you take
shows the truth
for you to make
This turn of phase
we might not see
is this the thirst of desire
found so easily
Try to push me 'round
the world some more
And make me live in fear
I bare all that I am
made of now
Attractive I don't care
'Cause even when I've danced with life
no one was there to share
Does this voice the wounds of your soul?
Caught in a Web
Removed from the world
Hanging on by a thread
Sinning the lies
devised in my head
Tried to save the life
you live and saw
It doesn't work for me
I bare all that I am
made of now
Attractive, I can't be
Inside the Dance of Life is one
I'll never hold to me
You can't heal the wounds of my soul
Caught in a Web
Removed from the world
Hanging on by a thread
Spinning a cage
Denied and misread

INNOCENCE FADED

Animation
breaths a cloudless mind
Facination
leaves the doubting mind
Until the circle breaks
and wisdom lies ahead
The faithful live Awake
The rest remain mislead
Some will transend spinning years
One as if time disappears
Innocence faded
the mirror falls behind you
Trinity jaded
I break down walls to find you
Callow and vain
fixed like a fossil, shrouding pain
Passionless stages
Distant like brothers
Wearing apothetic displays
Sharing flesh like envy in cages
Condescending
Not intending to end
Some will transcend spinning years
One as if time disappears
Innocence faded
the mirror falls behind yot
Trinity jaded
I break down walls to find you
Beginnings get complicated
the farther we progress
Opinions are calculated
Immune to openness
Beyond the circle's edge
We're driven by her blessings
Forever hesitating
Caught beneth the wheel
Innocence faded
The mirror falls behind you
Cynically jaded
The child will crawl to find you

A MIND BESIDE ITSELF

I. EROTOMANIA

II. VOICES

"Love, just don't stare"
He used to say to me
every Sunday morning
The spider in the window
The angel in the pool
The old man takes the poison
Now the widdow makes the rules
"So speak. I'm right here"
She used to say to me
not a word, not a word
Judas on the ceiling
the Devil in my bed
I guess Easter's never coming
So I'll just wait inside my head
Like a scream but sort of silent
living off my nightmares
Voices repeating me
 "Feeling threatened?
 We reflect your hopes and fears."
Other voices discussing me
 "Others steal your thoughts
 they're not confined
 within your mind."
Thought disorder
Dream control
Now they read my mind on the radio
But where is the Garden of Eden?
I feel elated
I feel depressed
Sex is death. Death is sex
Says it right here on my crucifix
Like a scream but sort of silent
living off my nightmares
Voices protecting me
 "Good behavior
 brings the savior
 to his knees."
Voices rejecting me
 "Others steal your thoughts
 they're not confined
 to your mind."
I'm kneeling on the floor
staring at the wall
like a spider in the window
I wish that I could speak
Is there fantasy in refuge?
God in politicians?
Should I turn to my religion?
These demons in my head tell me to
I'm lying here in bed
Swear my skin is inside out
Just another Sunday morning
Seen my diary on the newsstand
Seems we've lost the truth to quicksand
It's a shame no one is praying
'Cause these voices in my head
keep sayin...
"Love, just don't stare."
"Reveal the Word when you're
supposed to"
Withdrawn and introverted
Infectiously perverted
"Being laughed at and confused
keeps us pleasantly amused
enough to stay."
Maybe I'm just Cassandra fleeting
Twentieth century icon bleeding
Willing to risk Salvation
to escape from isolation
I'm whitness to redemption
heard you speak but never listened
Can you rid me of my secrets?
Deliver us from Darkness?
Voices repeating me
 "Feeling threatened?
 We reflect your hopes and fears."
Voices discussing me
Don't expect your own Messiah
This neverworld which you desire
is only in your mind.

III. THE SILENT MAN

A question well served
"Is silence like a fever?"
"A voice never heard?"
"Or a message with no reciever?"
Pray they won't ask
Behind the stained glass
There's always one more mask
Has man become a victim
of his woman, of his father?
If he elects not to bother,
will he suffocate their faith?
Desperate to fall
Behind the Great Wall
That separates us all
When there is reason
Tonight I'm Awake
When there's no answer
Arrive the Silent Man
If there is balance
tonight he's Awake
If they have to suffer
There lies the Silent Man
Sin without deceivers
A God with no believers
I could sail by
on the Winds of Silence
and maybe they won't notice
But this time I think
It's be better if I swim
When there is reason
Tonight I'm Awake
When there's no answer
Arrive the Silent Man
If there is balance
Tonight he's Awake
If they have to suffer
There lies the Silent Man

THE MIRROR

Temptation-
Why won't you leave me alone?
Lurking Every Corner, everywhere I go
Self Control-
Don't turn your back on me now
When I need you the most
Constant Pressure tests my will
My will or my wont
My Self control escapes from me still...
Hypocrite-
How could you be so cruel
and expect my faith in return?
Resistance-
Is not as hard as it seems
When you close the door
I spent so long trusting you
I trust you forgot
Just when I thought I believed in you...
It's time for me to deal
Becoming all to real
living in fear-
Why did you lie and pretend?
This has come to an end
I'll never trust you again
It's time to make your amends
Look in the mirror my friend
Let's stare the problem right in the eye
It's plagued me from coast to coast
Racing the clock to please everyone
All but the one who matters the most
Reflections of reality
are slowly coming into view
How in the hell could you possibly forgive me?
After the hell I put you through
It's time for me to deal
Becoming all to real
living in fear-
Why'd I betray my friend?
Lying until the end
Living life so pretend
It's time to make my amends
I'll never hurt you again

LIE

Daybreak
at the bottom of a lake
It's a hundred degrees I can't breath
And I won't get out
'til I figure it out
Though I'm weak like I can't believe
So you tell me "Trust me" I can trust you
Just let me show you
But I gotta work it out in a shadow of doubt
'cause I don't know if I know you
Doing fine but don't waste my time
Tell me what it is you want to say
You sin, you win, just let me in - hurry
I've been out in the rain all day
So you tell me "Trust me" I can trust you
as far as I can throw you
And I'm trying to get out of a shadow of doubt
'cause I don't know if I know you
Don't tell me you wanted me
Don't tell me you thought of me
I won't, I swear I won't
(Did)
I'll try, I swear I'll try
(Lie)
Mother Mary quite contrary
Kiss the boys and make them wary
Things are getting just a little bit scary
It's a wonder I can stil breathe
Never been much of a doubting Thomas
but nothing breaks like a broken promise
You tell me 'bout your two more coming
but once is just enough for me
I had gotten used to being a soul destroyed
She comes in apparently to fill the void
All dogs need a leash and
 at least I'll forget it
And she would never hurt me though
 she's never said it
But I'm not gonna ask her today
I don't wanna scare her away
Your town, I'm all alone
and I just can't stare at the phone
I wanna talk about lifelong mistakes
and you can tell your stepfather I said so

LIFTING SHADOWS OFF A DREAM

He seems alone and silent
thoughs remain without an answer
Afraid and uninvited
he slowly drifts away
Moved by desire and fear
Breaking delicate wings
Lifting Shadows
Off a Dream once broken
She can turn a drop of water
into an ocean
As the rain is pouring down
Tears of sorrow wash his mind
Drifting with the current
This stream of life flows on
He seems alone and silent
waiting on his hands and knees
The chill of winter's darkness sits quietly
Moved by desire and fear
he takes a few steps away
Lifting Shadows
Off a Dream once broken
She can turn a drop of water
into an ocean
And she listens openly
He pours his soul into the water
reflecting the mystery
She carries him away
and the winds die slowly
Lifting Shadows
Off a Dream once broken
She can turn a drop of water
into an ocean
Lifting shadows off a Dream

SCARED

To Rise, To Fall.
To Hurt, To Heal.
To Want, To Wait.
To Heal, To Save.
Can't hear it
we fear it
awareness won't come near it
Distractive
Reactive
Disguised in spite of time
I never bared my emotions
My passions always strong
I never lost my devotion
but somewhere fate went wrong
Can't let them rape me again
Your venom's not family here
won't let them fill me with
fatalistic remedies
What if the rest of the world
was hopelessly blinded with fear?
Where would my sanctity be?
Suddenly nobody cares.
It's never enough
You're wasting your time
Isn't there something I could say?
You don't understand
You're closing me out
How can we live our lives this way?
You tell me I'm wrong
I'm risking my life
Still, I have nothing in return
I show you my hands
You don't see the scars
Maybe you'll leave me here to burn.
What if the rest of the world
was hopelessly drowning in vain?
Where would our self pity run?
Suddenly everyone cares
Blood...Heal me
Fear...Change me
Belief will always save me
Blood...Swearing
Fear...Staring
Conviction made me aware
Give up on misery
Turn your back on dissent
Leave the distrust behind
Wash your hands of regret
Do you feel you don't know me anymore?
And do you feel I'm afraid of your love?
And how come you don't want me asking?
And how come my heart's not invited?
You say you want everyone happy
Well, we're not laughing.
And how come you don't understand me?
And how come I don't understand you?
Thirty years say we're in this together
So open your eyes.
People in prayer for me
everyone there for me
Sometimes I feel I should face this alone
My soul exposed
It calms me to know that I won't
Blood...Heal me
Fear...Change me
Belief will always save me
Blood...Swearing
Fear...Staring
Conviction made aware
Give up on misery
Turn your back on dissent
Leave their distrust behind
Wash your hands of regret
Blood...Heal me
Fear...Change me
Belief will always save me
Blood...Swearing
Fear...Staring
Conviction made aware
Learning from misery
Staring back at dissent
Leaving distrust behind
I'm inspired and content

SPACE-DYE VEST

Falling through pages of Martens on angels
Feeling my heart pull weat
I saw the future dressed as a stranger
love in a space-dye vest
Love is an act of blood and I'm bleeding
a pool in the shape of a heart
Beauty projection in the reflection
Always the worst way to start
Now that you're gone I'm trying to take it
Learning to swallow this rage
Found a new girl I think we can make it
as long as she stays on the page
This is not how I want it to end
And I'll never be open again
There's no one to take my blame
if they wanted to
Nothing to keep me sane
and it's all the same to you
There's nowhere to set my aim
so I'm everywhere
Never come near me again
do you really think I need you
And I'll smile and I'll learn to pretend
And I'l never be open again
And I'll have no more dreams to defend
And I'll never be open again


--
	************************************************/\
	          c_caddy@oz.plymouth.edu              /  \
	****************************************.------    ------.
	    Clayton Scott "Cc" Caddy  (Ghost)    `-._        _.-'
	   "I'm gone 'Without a Trace'. C-ya"       /  .'`.  \
	*******************************************/.-'    `-.\