(Intro: D D9 D D D9 D D Dsus4 D D9 D ) 
 
           C          G                       D            G 
  And the sign said "Long-haired freaky people need not apply" 
     D                   A                    G                  A 
  So I tucked my hair up under my hat, and I went in to ask him why 
 Bm                        Bm/A                   Em (?)             G6/A (?) 
  He said "You look like a fine, upstanding young man, I think you'll do" 
        D                          A                G               A 
  So I took off my hat and said "Imagine that! Heh, me workin' for you!" 
           D        C             G 
    Whoa, sign sign everywhere a sign 
      D                          G 
    Blockin' out the scenery, breakin' my mind 
    D                  A                        C/G     D (+ intro suspensions) 
    Do this, don't do that, can't you read the sign? 
           C                 G                D                      G 
  And the sign said anybody caught trespassin' would be shot out of sight 
         D                         A 
  So I jumped on the fence and I yelled at the house 
       G                    A 
  "Hey, what gives you the right? 
 
  You put up a fence to keep me out but to keep Mother Nature in, 
 
  If God was here he'd tell you to your face, "Man you're some kind of sinner!" 
 

           D             C          G             A 
  Now hey there mister can't you read? 
       G                      D 
  You gotta have a shirt and tie to get a seat 
                            A 
  You can't even watch, no you can't even 
   
 
G                    D 
  You ain't supposed to be here........ 
   C             G                        D             G 
  Sign said you got to have a membership card to get inside...Uhhh! 
 
(instrumental) (then slow) 
 

           C          G                      D                   G 
  And the sign said "Everybody welcome, come in, kneel down and pray" 
                  D                               A 
  But when they passed around the plate and they emptied it all 
     G                      A 
  I didn't have a penny to pay 
       Bm                 Bm/A          Em                   G6/A 
  So I got me a pen and a paper, and I made up my own little sign 
            D                  A                      G               A 
  I said "Thank you Lord for thinkin' about me, I'm alive and doin' fine!" 
          D             C          G 
  Signs, signs, everywhere signs 
  D                       C      G 
  Blockin' up the scenery, messin' my mind 
  A                 G 
  Do this, don't do that 
                   C 
  Can't you read the signs
        D             C          G 
 Signs, signs, everywhere signs 
 D                       C      G 
 Blockin' up the scenery, messin' my mind 
 D                A                               
 Do this, don't do that 
                   C 
 Can't you read the signs