Intro: Em , G , C , Em
       Em , G , C , B

  Em              G               C            Em
I walked into the Nag's Head fu-t sustinate me belly,
             Em               G
There were a fit crack in the corner but
  C                 B
I knew her cunt was smelly,
    Em               G              C              Em
She smelt of rotting fish heads and old and crispy sick,
Em                 G                 C              B
Said her name were Charlotte and she wanted suck me dick.
      Em               G
Oh, I thought now lad, times are hard,
         C              Em
and it's nearly closing time,
           Em                     G
I'll put a bag on her head, and a peg on me nose,
         C                    B
And I'll grummage through the slime...


Em               C               B
Charlotte is the biggest slag in Macc,
          Em            C              B
She'll do anything fu-t get you in the sack,
         Em                   C            B
With her legs spread wide she opens up her crack,
Em              C                 B
Spends her life just lying on her back.


         Em               G
Well, we walked along, up Buxton Road,
    C                  Em
And strolled along the cut,
          Em                       G
She said "give us an inch and I'll take a yard."
     C                  B
So I slammed her half a foot.
       Em                           G
Got me hand up her skirt 'cos I'm a Macc Lad,
      C                   Em
And I knew just what fu-t do,
         Em                       G
I got me hand inside, and then me arm inside,
  C                         B
I lost it right up to me tattoo.


    Em               C               B
Oh, Charlotte is the biggest slag in Macc,
          Em            C              B
She'll do anything fu-t get you in the sack,
Em              C                B
Coffee, sex and johnny bags come free,
Em           C           B
So crabs and herpes and VD.
   Em
Oh Charlotte.....


Break: Em , G , C , Em
       Em , G , C , B


       Em          G
And we ended up at her place,
      C                 Em
And I waded through the johnnies,
         Em                  G
She put another notch in her bedstead,
      C                  B
while I watched "The Two Ronnies".


Em               C               B
Charlotte is the biggest slag in Macc,
    Em               C                    B
She lies in wait and then she springs her trap,
      Em              C              B
She's always got fu-t take the upper hand,
        Em                      C            B   B   A   G
And you are what you drink, and I'm a bitter man.
Em
Charlotte...