It's Christmas time and Santa's here,

 Making the children smile

 But he's just a pedophile

 So you better watch your child.

 Christmas trees in every house

 Covered in shiny lights

 But they just turn brown and die,

 Or set your whole house on fire
 
These are the reasons I hate the seasons, but imma give it a try.
G#m               Eb              Bb       F
Maybe this year I wont be sad on Christmas
G#m              Eb     Bb   F
Maybe I'll have a happy holiday.
G#m  
Replace my heart ache and my pain,
F#
With mistletoe and candy cane
F                          Bb
This Christmas, could go my way.

 
Having fun with all your friends,

 Sipping on that eggnog,

 But it just looks like jizz

 All over your upper lips.

 House made out of ginger bread

 Cookies like Christmas trees

 Giving ya heart disease

 And type 2 diabetes.
 
These are the reasons I hate the seasons, but imma give it a try.
 
G#m               Eb              Bb       F
Maybe this year I wont be sad on Christmas
G#m              Eb     Bb   F
Maybe I'll have a happy holiday.
G#m  
Replace my heart ache and my pain,
F#
With mistletoe and candy cane
F                          Bb
This Christmas, could go my way.
 
I've never seen reindeer fly

 I've never heard the sleigh bells ring

 I've never seen a snowman come to life

 I've never heard the angels sing

 But I hope, and I pray

 That maybe this Christmas day

 That'll change.
 
G#m               Eb              Bb       F
Maybe this year I wont be sad on Christmas
G#m              Eb     Bb   F
Maybe I'll have a happy holiday.
G#m  
Replace my heart ache and my pain,
F#
With mistletoe and candy cane
F                          Bb
This Christmas, could go my way.

G#m               Eb              Bb       F
Maybe this year I wont be sad on Christmas
G#m              Eb     Bb   F
Maybe I'll have a happy holiday.
G#m  
Replace my heart ache and my pain,
F#
With mistletoe and candy cane
F                          Bb
This Christmas, could go my way. 
F
Just dance with me.