[CHORUS #1: Ebm, B, F#, C#]
I just had sex and it felt so good
A woman let me put my penis inside of her
I just had sex and I'll never go back
To the not-havin'-sex-ways-of-the-past

[VERSE #1: Ebm, B, F#, C#]
Have you ever had sex I have it felt great
It felt so good when I did it with my penis
A girl let me do it, it literally just happened
Havin' sex can make a nice man out the meanest
Never guess where I just came from-- I had sex
If I had to describe the feeling it was the best
When I had the sex man my penis felt great
And I called my parents right after I was done
Oh hey didn't see you there guess what I just did
Had sex, undressed, saw her boobies and the rest
Was sure nice of her to let you do that thing
Nice of any girl ever-- now sing

[CHORUS #2: Ebm, B, F#, C#]
I just had sex and it felt so good
A woman let me put my penis inside of her
I wanna tell the world

[VERSE #2: Ebm, B, F#, C#]
To be honest I'm surprised she even wanted me to do it
Doesn't really make sense but man, screw it
I ain't one to argue with a good thing
She could be my wife- that good?
The best thirty seconds of my life
I'm so humbled by a girl's ability to let me do her
'Cause honestly I'd have sex with a pile of manure
With that in mind the soft nice smellin' girl is better
'Cause she let me wear my chain and my turtle neck sweater

[BRIDGE #1: Ebm, B, F#, C#] 
So this one's dedicated to them girls
That let us flop around on top of them
If you're near or far, whether short or tall,
We wanna thank you all for lettin' us fuck you
She kept lookin' at her watch (doesn't matter had sex)
But I cried the whole time (doesn't matter had sex)
I think she  might have been a racist (doesn't matter had sex)
She put a bag on my head (still counts)

[CHORUS#3: Ebm, B, F#, C#]
I just had sex and my dreams came true
So if you had sex in the last thirty minutes
Then you're qualified to sing with me

[CHORUS #4: Em, C, G, D]
I just had sex and it felt so good
A woman let me put my penis inside of her
I just had sex and I'll never go back
To the not-having-sex-ways of the past