This is the second song on the Derek and Clive Live Album
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dudley_Moore

www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ZEEgIti8sM

I have removed the swear words

Jump (Dudley Moore)

D (xx0232@1)                                 GAs (320003@1)I was walking down the street one day,
Em7               AI (x02220@1)saw a house on fire,
DThere (xx0232@1)was a man standing at an upper storey window
                                                      G (320003@1)   A (x02220@1)Shouting and screaming to the crowd that was gathered there below,
 G (320003@1)         A (x02220@1)     DFor (xx0232@1)he was sore afraid,
 D (xx0232@1)                GJump, (320003@1)you mucker, Jump,
 Em7                                      AJump (x02220@1)into this 'ere blanket what we are holding,
     D (xx0232@1) Em7 D/F#A DAnd (xx0232@1)you will be alright.",
    D (xx0232@1)                            G (320003@1)      AHe (x02220@1)jumped, hit the deck, broke his bloody neck,
D   Em7 D/F# A D
There was no blanket.
 D (xx0232@1)               GLaugh, (320003@1)we nearly shat,
 Em7
We have not laughed so much since grandma died,
       G (320003@1)                                 AOr (x02220@1)Aunty Mable caught her left one in the mangle,
   G (320003@1)            A (x02220@1)     D (xx0232@1) Em7 D/F#A DWe (xx0232@1)are miserable sinners, Fiiiiiiiiilthy muckers.
G (320003@1)       DAmen (xx0232@1)