Standard tuning. No capo
This is a tough song to tab because its so fast and heavy, it's hard to get the distinct 
guitar part figured out. If you have any more ideas, let me know. I tried my best. 
Better than nothing, I hope.

D
Don't you say
          G                         Bb               A
don't you ever ever say that it was worth it for the profit.
D
Another day

when I wait there shit-faced
                  G                   A
Then I smile when I'm on and sing the songs that I did not write.

Bm                    G
And they'll dance to it.
A                   D
And I'll smile and I'll get paid.
Bm                   G
Baggy pants are stupid.
A         A        A
Alt-rock, Skynyrd, play another song I hate.

D         G           A     G
I'll just stay on the state streets
Bb    A               D    G   A
Complaining that it's all the same
    G            Bb    A
but too lazy to change anything.
D                    G
And I can't spend another day
Bb   A         D          G
thinkin' these places on street signs are
                     Bb     A
the only places that I've ever been.

D
Drink a free beer, maybe smoke with the waiter.
G                          Bb      A
(It's) the illusion that they all give a shit.
D
And some drunk guys yelling "Free Bird!" and "Show us your boobs!"
G                           Bb     A
and I'll smile and I'll key their truck.

Bm               G
And it sucks so bad
      A
But I made one Benjamin.
D          Bb
How can I be mad?
A          A
I paid one seventh of my rent
A          A
And maybe I'll buy a plate of eggs.

D         G           A     G
I'll just stay on the state streets
Bb    A               D    G
Complaining that it's all the same
    G            Bb    A
but too lazy to change anything.
D                    G
And I can't spend another day
Bb   A         D          G
thinkin' these places on street signs are
       G             Bb     A
the only places that I've ever been.

F#m
I'm not feelin' Minnesota.
G                A                          Bbdim          D
I sit next to an ATM and people check their balance during my set.
F#m                           G
And play cover songs from the 90's
   G                      G#dim
by one-hit-wonders, Chumbawumba, Tubthumper
A                                Bbdim  A    D
and a jersey-wearing motherfucker withdraws his twenty bucks.