NUMBERS Recorded by Bobby Bare Written by Shel Silverstein G (320003@1) DI (xx0232@1)was sittin' here Friday suppin' on a glass of wine GWhen (320003@1)in walked a chick who almost struck me blind CShe (x32010@1)had wet blue eyes and her legs were long and fine D (xx0232@1) GOn (320003@1)a scale of ONE to TEN (pause) I'd give her a NINE. G (320003@1) DNow (xx0232@1)on my scale there ain't no TEN's, you know GNINE (320003@1)is about as far as any chick can go CSo (x32010@1)I flashed her a smile, but she didn't even look at me D (xx0232@1) GSo (320003@1)for brains and good judgement, give her a THREE. G (320003@1) DI (xx0232@1)said, hey sweet thing, you look like a possible EIGHT GYou (320003@1)and me could, uh! make EIGHTEEN, if your head's on straight CShe (x32010@1)looked up and down my perfect frame D (xx0232@1) GAnd (320003@1)said these words that burned into my perfect brain. G (320003@1) DShe (xx0232@1)said, well, another one of those macho Texas men GTryin' (320003@1)to grade all women on scales of ONE to TEN CAnd, (x32010@1)uh!, you give me an EIGHT, well, that's a generous thing to do D (xx0232@1) GNow, (320003@1)let's just see, just how much I give you. (CHANGE TO KEY OF A) A (x02220@1) EShe (022100@1)said you comin' on to me with that phony NUMBERS jive AYour (x02220@1)style makes me smile, I give it a FIVE DWhen (xx0232@1)you walked up I noticed that suit of (yores) E (022100@1) AIt's (x02220@1)last year's double knit-french cuffs, give it a FOUR. A (x02220@1) EThat (022100@1)must be your car parked out on the curb AThat (x02220@1)'SIXTY-NINE homemade convertible, A THREE and A THIRD DI (xx0232@1)saw that build, I guess (yore) less than FIVE E (022100@1) ASaid, (x02220@1)for your pot belly, I'd give that a TEN for size. A (x02220@1) EThat (022100@1)wine you're pourin' might be fine to you ABut (x02220@1)I'm used to fine champagne, I give it a TWO DIt's (xx0232@1)hard to tell what your flashin' smile is worth E (022100@1) AI (x02220@1)give it a SIX, you could use some dental work. A (x02220@1) EBut, (022100@1)It's your struttin' rooster act that really makes me laugh AIt (x02220@1)may be a TEN to these country hens, but to me a THREE and A HALF DAnd (xx0232@1)there really ain't much to add once the subtractin's done E (022100@1) AAnd (x02220@1)since there ain't no ZEROes, I give you a ONE. A (x02220@1) EShe (022100@1)walked out, while up and down the line AThe (x02220@1)whole bar was laughin', sayin' BARE, what happened to your NINE DNINE (xx0232@1)says I, hell soon as she started to talk I knew E (022100@1) AShe (x02220@1)didn't have no class, I barely gave her a TWO. (TALK) Yeah! No matter how good they look at first There's flaws in all of them That's why on a scale of TEN to ONE, friend There ain't no TEN. Can't play "Numbers"? Improve your playing via easy step-by-step video lessons! UG plus: remove banner comments We did not receive enough feedback on this tab! Please rate: print report bad tab 1 2 3 4 5 I want to post comment or correction [tab] guest You may want to rate the tab now too: select rating Please do not post tabs as comments. 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