Credit to mike/howardfinke1483 from the Mountain Goats wiki

E B Am E
E B Am E

E     B            A       E
I am ready for my close up today
E             B             A               E
Too long I’ve let my self-respect stand in my way
         C#m    E                    A     E
Well the prom queen's caught in the high beams
          C#m    E           A     B
And the strings keen it’s a big scene

              E                 C#m
But when the house goes up in flames
F#m                 A
No one emerges triumphantly from it
         E                          C#m
When the scum begins to circle the drain
F#m                Am
Everybody loves a winner

E B Am E
E B Am E

E             B            A       E
I spent eight hours in my make-up chair
E        B                     A      E
Waxed my chest and shaved off all my hair
          C#m     E             A       E
Well the fire's bright and the frame's tight
       C#m   E                 A        B
Try to get right; well, we’ve still got light

              E                 C#m
But when the house goes up in flames
F#m                 Am
No one emerges triumphantly from it
         E                          C#m
When the scum begins to circle the drain
F#m                Am
Everybody loves a winner

              E                 C#m
But when the house goes up in flames
F#m                 A
         E                          C#m
When the scum begins to circle the drain
F#m                A

E B A E
E B A A