INTRO:   D5 A5 D5 
 
D5                                              D5 
Darlin, you say you love me, But there so many things  
          G5                        D5 
you could do to prove that love to me. 
 
You kiss me, and you hold me, bring me flowers all the time 
    E5                               A5 
But that?s not enough to satisfy my needs 
 

       G5                            D5 
If you love me, you?ll sleep on the wet spot. 
             A5                       D5 
You?d buy my tampons, with your food stamps. 
                   G5                          D5  
You?d take out the garbage, clean out the cat box. 
               A5                       D5 
If you love me darlin, the wet spot is yours. 
 
 
D5                                                             D5 
No you can?t watch Jerry Springer, cause my dadgum wrastlin?s on 
              G5                       D5 
Now keep that baby just as quiet as a mouse 
                                                        
And get your booty in that kitchen, and fry me up 
     E5                                           A5 
some pork chops and eggs, like they do at waffle house. 
 
 
       G5                            D5 
If you love me, you?ll sleep on the wet spot. 
             A5                       D5 
You?d buy my tampons, with your food stamps. 
                   G5                          D5  
You?d take out the garbage, clean out the cat box. 
               A5                       D5 
If you love me darlin, the wet spot is yours. 
 

G5 
Quit your snorin, it?s so borin, 
  
and I?m freezin, cause your teasin me 
     D5 
with just the corner of the covers, 
 
I could smother your face, 
         B5 
with the pillow, billowin? the sheets 
                     E5               A5 
when you roll on the dog and he lets one, loose. 
 
 
       G5                            D5 
If you love me, you?ll sleep on the wet spot. 
             A5                       D5 
You?d buy my tampons, with your food stamps. 
                   G5                          D5  
You?d take out the garbage, clean out the cat box. 
               A5                       D5 
If you love me darlin, the wet spot is yours. 
               A5                       D5 
If you love me darlin, the wet spot is yours. 
   A5            D5 
Or sleep on the floor