Verse 1:
C                               G
Ground floor Shoppers' Paradise habit-dashery, needles, spoons and knives 
C                                      G      
knuckle-dusters, glass jaws and wooden hearts 
C                                              
Spend your money girls on sprays and lipsticks 
G
tested on bunnies, girls, strays and misfits 
C                                             G                       C           
ozone friendly rape alarms for those blinding dates another summer of hate 

Verse 2:
C                                           G
It's the top shop for the tired and rundown going up for the final comedown 
C                                               G    
First and second floors, third and fourth world wars 
            C                   
We've got a free pair of flares, with every hip replacement 
G                                            
just take the stairs to the bargain basement 
C                                                     
Babies bottles full ot the milk of human kind nestle. 

Chorus:
G          C          G        C     
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls 
    G           C           G         C     
the big shop is open it's a wonderful world 

Verse 3:
C                                        G
Top floor Shoppers' Paradise we've got a drunk Father Christmas and The Antichrist 
C                                                G
We've got nothing of value so there's no V.A.T. were going S.H.O.P.P.I.N.G. 
        C                              
We take Visa, Access, American Express 
G                                             
patched-up, hand-me-down, second to next best 
C                                        
clothes for all ages, mothers and babies 

Chorus:

Verse 4:
C                                        
Going down for all the things you missed 
        G                                          
all the love. peace and happiness that don't exist 
          C                                       G
We've got enpsychopaedias we've got pic 'n' fix a government freezer full of benefits 
  C                                               
A children's assortment we're bigger than Hamleys 
          G                                             
We've got Cabbage Patch orphans from Sylvanian Famllies 
C                                  
Carpets. Iinoleum , holy petroleum , 
G                                                
Chemi-kaze killers, little Hitlers and Napoleans 
C                                        G                                 C
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls the big shop is open and the world is wonderful 


Ending: C   G     C   G      C   G     C   G