Chords are 
      D , D/C , D/B , D/A  or you can play A , A/G , A/F# , A/F 
Intro: 

Folks, I'd like to sing a song about the American dream 

About you.  About me. 

About the way our  American hearts beat way down in the bottoms of our  

chests. 

About that special feeling we get in the cocles (or watever) of our hearts. 

Maybe below the cocles. 

Maybe in the sub-cocle area. 

Maybe in the liver, maybe in the kidneys, maybe even in the colon. 

We don't know. 
 
Verse 1: 

I'm just a regular Joe with a regular job. 

I'm your avergage white, suburbanite slob. 

I like football and porno and books about war. 

I got an average house with a nice hardwood floor. 

My wife and my job, 

my kids and my car. 

My feet on my table 

with a Cuban cigar 

But sometimes that just ain't enough to a man like me interested 

No, I got to go out and have fun  

at someone else's expense 

I drive really slow in the ultra-fast lane 

While people behind me are going insane 
 
Chorus: 

I'm an #@#@##  

I'm an @#@@#@  
 
Verse 2: 

I use public toilets and I piss on the seat 

I walk around in the summertime sayin' how about this heat 
 
Chorus 
 
Verse 3: 

Sometimes I park in handicap spaces 

while handicapped people make handicapped faces 
 
Chorus 
 
Bridge: 
Em                 A 
Maybe I shouldn't be singing this song. 
Em                   A 
Ranting and raving and carrying on. 
Em                          A 
Maybe they're right when they tell me I'm wrong.