Cm
When I was young, I used to be,
   A#
As fine a man as ever you'd see, 
         Cm
'til the Prince of Wales, he said to me, 
         Fm               Cm
Come and join the British army. 

(it's the same through out the rest of the song.) 

Too-ra loo-ra loo-ra loo, 
They're lookin' for monkeys up in the zoo, 
And since when have I had a face like you? 
I'd join the British army. 

Sarah Comden baked a cake, 
It's all for poor old Slattery's sake, 
She threw meself into the lake, 
Pretendin' I was balmy. 

Too-ra loo-ra loo-ra loo, 
I've made me mind up what to do, 
Now I'll work me ticket home to you, 
And *pfft* the British army. 

Sergeant Heeley went away, 
And his wife got in the family way, 
And the only words that she could say, 
Was blame the British army. 

Too-ra loo-ra loo-ra loo, 
Me curse upon the Labour blue, 
That took me darlin' boy from me, 
To join the British army. 

Corporal Sheen's a turn o' the 'bout, 
Just give him a couple o' jars o' stout, 
He'll bake the enemy with his mouth, 
And save the British army. 

Too-ra loo-ra loo-ra loo, 
I've made me mind up what to do, 
Now I'll work me ticket home to you, 
And *Fuck* the British army.