The Naughty Sailors' Alphabet


G        G           C             G
A is for arsehole all covered in hair
D        D            C               G
B is for blowjob after which we don't care
G        D          C                   G
C is for cunt which doth glisten and pong
G           G         D              G
D's diarrhea, that's shit all gone wrong  

Chorus
G        G        C             G
Merrily, merrily, so merry sail we
D          D          C             G
No mortal on Earth Like a sailor at sea
G           D          C                G
Heave away, haul away, the ship roles along
G           G            D                         G
Give a sailor his gobble and there's fuck all goes wrong

E is for eunuch with only one ball
F's the poor fucker that's got none at all
G is for gobble which we've already had
H is for the handfull which can't be that bad

Chorus

I is for incest, that's fucking your mum
J is for jobfull, that's one up the arm
K is for knickers all torn up and stamped on
L is for locked up with clamps on my Hampton

Chorus

M is for morals, we hope you have none
N's for the nasty that belongs to the nun
O is for orifice, that's long for a whole
P is for penis, that's prick to a prole

Chorus

Q is for question that says do you fuck?
R is the answer like hard fucking luck!
S is for shit, what a foul fucking lot!
T's tits and turds, and  tossers, and twots!

Chorus

U is for uniform, preferably school
V's for vagina, that's cunt only cool
W's for wanking, that's caning our cocks
X is the experiment of fucking your socks

Chorus

Y is for y-fronts all skid marked and grimy 
Z is for zollocks, it's wrong but it's rhymy
There's butter and cheese and bread on the shelf
If you want anymore then go fuck yourself!