Transcribed by Rob
Intro:
Gm Eb twice
Gm Eb
I know what you're all wondering
Gm Gm
Have Tripod ever been to Japan
Eb
But you're ignoring a much bigger question
Bb
Why don't the Japanese have a space program
Eb
Why aren't there any Japanese astronauts
Bb F# Ab
Have you ever seen a Japanese astronau________t
C
I'll tell you why you haven't seen one
Eb
I'll tell you why
Bb F Eb Gm
You can't do the Japanese Tea Ceremony when you're an astronaut
F
It's those damn fat gloves
Bb F Eb Gm
And you can't do the Japanese Tea Ceremony when you're in zero grav
F
Cos the tea goes everywhere
Gm
The tea goes everywhere
Gm Eb
Japanese culture's always fanscinated me
Gm
From their traditions to their modern way of life
Eb
But all their elegance and rich history
Bb
Doesn't sit well with my interest in space
Bb F Eb Gm
Because you can't carry out a ninja style assassination dressed as an astronaut
F
It's the luminous fabric (you're too visible)
Bb F Eb Gm
And they don't let you use a samurai sword when you're an astronaut
F
You might puncture the suit
Gm
You might depressurize
F Gm F#
Like a gremlin in a microwa_____ve
Ab C#
But it's those damn fat gloves
F
They're the main problem
F# C#
You can't nurture your tamagotchi
F F#
You can't make an origami swan
Ab A Bbm Eb
Have you ever tried to get a used panty vending machine into a space shuttle
Eb C#
Well I've tried and they don't let you
F#
Fucking NASA red tape
Interlude:
Gm Eb Gm Eb Bb Eb Bb Eb
Gm Eb
I couldn't reconcile the two things that I loved
Gm
So I threw away my dreams of outer space
Eb
I had to find myself a whole new job
Bb
Maybe in the sports arena I would find a place
Bb F Eb Gm
But you can't do a Japanese Tea Ceremony when you're a boxing champ
F
It's those damned fat gloves again
Bb F Eb Gm
Those confounded puffy mitts loom in front of my face every night in bed
F
I'm haunted by fat gloves
Bb
You can't drink sake, you can't do bukkake
F
Or ride a Kawasaki
Eb F#
When you're an astronaut
F#(let ring) Ab(let ring)
And they don't let you be an astronaut on Japanese tele
A#(let ring)
Cos you're not enough of a red herring
***************************************************************************
Capo 3rd fret version
Intro:
Em C twice
Em C
I know what you're all wondering
Em Em
Have Tripod ever been to Japan
C
But you're ignoring a much bigger question
G
Why don't the Japanese have a space program
C
Why aren't there any Japanese astronauts
G Eb F
Have you ever seen a Japanese astronau________t
A
I'll tell you why you haven't seen one
C
I'll tell you why
G D C Em
You can't do the Japanese Tea Ceremony when you're an astronaut
D
It's those damn fat gloves
G D C Em
And you can't do the Japanese Tea Ceremony when you're in zero grav
D
Cos the tea goes everywhere
Em
The tea goes everywhere
Back to verse
Em C
Japanese culture's always fanscinated me
Em
From their traditions to their modern way of life
C
But all their elegance and rich history
G
Doesn't sit well with my interest in space
G D C Em
Because you can't carry out a ninja style assassination dressed as an astronaut
D
It's the luminous fabric (you're too visible)
G D C Em
And they don't let you(Ooooh) use a samurai sword when you're an astronaut
D
You might puncture the suit
Em
You might depressurize
D Em Eb
Like a gremlin in a microwa_____ve
F Bb
But it's those damn fat gloves
D
They're the main problem
Eb Bb
You can't nurture your tamagotchi
D Eb
You can't make an origami swan
F F# Gm C
Have you ever tried to get a used panty vending machine into a space shuttle
C Bb
Well I've tried and they don't let you
Eb
Fucking NASA red tape
Interlude:
Em C Em C G C G C
Em C
I couldn't reconcile the two things that I loved
Em
So I threw away my dreams of outer space
C
I had to find myself a whole new job
G
Maybe in the sports arena I would find a place
G D C Em
But you can't do a Japanese Tea Ceremony when you're a boxing champ
D
It's those damned fat gloves again
G D C Em
Those confounded putty mitts loom in front of my face every night in bed
D
I'm haunted by fat gloves
G
You can't drink sake, you can't do bukkake
D
Or ride a Kawasaki
C Bb
When you're an astronaut
Bb(let ring) C(let ring)
And they don't let you be an astronaut on Japanese tele
G(let ring)
Cos you're not enough of a red herri
