Note: this is not mine, I found it on an internet forum, if you tabbed it a) thanks b) sorry c) your an idiot to post it on a forum and not expect it to be shared about a bit. Thanks! (A) E/G#Obviously (143121@4)I don't want to infer that being invited onto Friday Night with Wossy F#m (244222@1) Eisn't (022100@1)wonderfully affirming, and I know I oughta Aappreciate (x02220@1)the risk you took, the bookers who agreed to book E/G# (143121@4) F#m (244222@1) Ea (022100@1)chap who tends to talk about the kinda things that get the BBC in hot water. A6And (x04xxx@1)I don't want to seem greedy, I'm just saying (E) I'd like to be here every week if that's OK. Fo7(or E7b9/F) And, if you'll hear me out, I think I've got a way F#m (244222@1) E (022100@1) Din (xx0232@1)which we could do it pretty easily. EYou (022100@1)can leave all the boring details to me. A6* Eadd2/A* F#m/A* It's a brilliant idea, a truly original concept. A6* Eadd2/A* E/BNo (443121@4)one in Britain has ever done anything like it yet. Picture this - imagine if we had (A) E/G# (143121@4) F#m (244222@1) E (022100@1) Dfive (xx0232@1)poofs and two pianos - yeah, it's a wicked idea. A (x02220@1) E/G#Why (143121@4)settle for a quartet of queers D/F# (200232@1) EWhen (022100@1)there's a possibility of a penta-poofter-piano-posse here? (A) E/G# (143121@4) F#m (244222@1) E (022100@1) DFive (xx0232@1)poofs and two pianos - yeah, it'll be ace: A (x02220@1) E/G# (143121@4) D (xx0232@1) Aa (x02220@1)hundred percent more pianos and twenty five percent more gays. Pickup: E F# Ab (A) I know, I know, I've seen the problem too. (E/A) There's a rumour I am straight, it's true. (D/A) DmIt (xx0231@1)hurts to admit it, but I'm about as bent Dmas (xx0231@1)Wossy himself or Fiddy Cent. (A) But I've already thought it through. (E/A) D'you know there's preachers in America who reckon they can do Dsexuality (xx0232@1)conversions. I've heard them assert D7they (xx0212@1)can cure a man of trouser love and turn him onto skirt. E7Well (020130@1)I don't see why they couldn't pull the same trick in reverse, and we'd have - (A) E/G# (143121@4) F#m (244222@1) E (022100@1) Dfive (xx0232@1)poofs and two pianos - yeah, it's a revolution A (x02220@1) E/G#and (143121@4)probably the best solution D (xx0232@1) Eto (022100@1)the problem you're inevitably having with an even number of homosexuals. Pickup: E F# Ab (A) Yes I know your producers might suspect (E/A) that the licence-paying public will object (D/A) Dto (xx0232@1)the Corporation having yet Dmanother (xx0231@1)homosexual to pay. (A) The Daily Mail will bring the big guns out. (E/A) Jan Moir will be frothing at the mouth, (D/A) writing further brilliant stuff about (Dm) Ethe (022100@1)myth about being both happy and gay. F#m (244222@1) F#m/A F#m/C# But all that moral indignation D/F# (200232@1) A/Ewill (002220@1)disappear when they see D (xx0232@1) Athose (x02220@1)four lovely guys and me Bm (x24432@1) Esinging (022100@1)in perfect harmony. F#m/A And all those angry letter writers, D/Alike (x00232@1)'Disgusted' from the Isle of Wight F#m/A and 'Mad' from Hull and 'Outraged' from Leeds E (022100@1) E7 (020130@1) Fo7 and 'Slightly Annoyed' from Berwick on Tweed, F#m (244222@1) E (022100@1) Dwill (xx0232@1)instantly change their tune. A (x02220@1) EThey'll (022100@1)be bleeding-heart liberals by Saturday noon. DThey'll (xx0232@1)be giving their grandchildren up for adoption E (022100@1) E7 (020130@1) Fo7 in the hope that a gay married couple will adopt 'em. FThey'll (133211@1)be putting rainbow stickers on their cars, G (320003@1) E (022100@1) (Bass line - A (x02220@1)E F E G A) and cutting holes in the arse of their leather strides. And watching 2 pianos and 5 guys Watching 2 pianos and 5 guys G(picks (320003@1)up on the Gin (320003@1)the bass line) Watching 2 pianos and five ..1, 2 ,3, 4, (C) G/B (143121@7) Am (x02210@1) G (320003@1) F5 (133211@1)poofs and 2 pianos - yeah, it'll be grand. C (x32010@1) G/B (143121@7) F (133211@1) CYou (x32010@1)can never have too many pianos or too much man. (C) G/B (143121@7) Am (x02210@1) F5 (133211@1)poofs and 2 pianos - maybe we could out Jamie Cullum. G (320003@1) F (133211@1) CMake (x32010@1)it a trio of pianos and a big gay half dozen.
