A5         D5                 E5 
MAYBE YOU THOUGHT I WAS THE PACKARD 
              C#5    B5 
GOOSE 
       A5      D5 
OR THE RONALD MCDONALD OF THE 
E5                     C#5   B5 
NOUVEAU-ABSTRUSE 
          A5                       D5                      E5 
WELL FUCK ALL THEM PEOPLE, I DON'T NEED 
           A5             G5      D5     E5 
NO EXCUSE FOR BEING WHAT I AM 
C#5              B5 
DO YOU HEAR ME, THEM? 
                 A5                       D5 
ALL THEM ROCK 'N' ROLL WRITERS IS THE 
E5                      A5   B5 
WORST KIND OF SLEEZE 
              A5                      D5 
SELLING PUNK LIKE SOME NEW KIND OF 
E5                            A5   B5 
ENGLISH DISEASE 
                       A5                  D5 
IS THAT THEM WAVE OF THE FUTURE 
G5    D5              E5 
AW, SPARE ME PLEASE 
 

C#5         B5    (chord set 1) 
OH NO YOU GOTTA GO 
C#5                  B5 
WHO DO YOU WRITE FOR,I WANNA KNOW 
   A5           B5         C#5 
I BELIEVE YOU IS THE GOVERNMENT'S 

WHORE 
F#5 
AND KEEPING PEOPLES DUMB IS WHERE 
A5 
YOU'RE COMING FROM 

(TWICE) 
 

A5                        D5                           E5 
FUCK ALL THEM WRITER WITH THE PEN IN 
                              C#5   B5 
THEIR HAND 
            A5               D5                       E5 
I WILL BE MORE SPECIFIC SO THEY MIGHT 
                               C#5    B5 
 UNDERSTAND 
                    A5               D5 
THEY CAN ALL KISS MY ASS 
        E5                           A5 
BUT BECAUSE IT'S SO GRAND 
         G5                D5      E5 
THEY BEST JUST STAY AWAY, HEY, HEY, 

HEY. 
 
(CHORD SET 1) 

HEY JOE WHO DID YOU BLOW? 

MOE PUSHED THE BUTTON BOY 

AND YOU WENT TO THE SHOW 

BETTER SUCK A LITTLE HARDER OR THE 

SHEKELS WONT FLOW 

AND I DON'T MEAN YOU THUMB 

SO ON YOUR KNEES YOU BUM 

JUST TELL YOURSELF IT'S YUM 

AND SUCK IT TILL ITS NUMB 
 

F#5 
JOURNALISM'S KINDA SCARY 
A5 
AND OF IT WE SHOULD BE WARY 
F#5 
WONDER WHAT BECAME OF MARY? 

A etc. . . 

HI! IT'S ME. THE GIRL FROM THE BUS 

REMEMBER THE LAST TOUR, WELL 

INFORMATION IS NOT KNOWLEDGE 

WISDOM IS NOT TRUTH 

TRUTH IS NOT BEAUTY 

BEAUTY IS NOT LOVE 

LOVE IS NOT MUSIC 

MUSIC IS THE BEST 

WISDOM IS THE DOMAIN OF THE WIZ 

WHICH IS EXTINCT 

BEAUTY IS A FRENCH PHONETIC 

CORRUPTION 

OF A SHORT CLOTH NECK ORNAMENT 

CURRENTLY IN RESURGENCE 
 

     A5                D5                       E5 
IF YOUR IN THE AUDIENCE AND LIKE WHAT 
              C#5   B5 
WE DO 
               A5                    D5 
WELL WE WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT WE 
E5                                 C#5  B5 
LIKE YOU ALL TOO 
        A5                D5                           E5 
BUT AS FOR THE SUCKER WHO WILL WRITE 
       C#5 
THE REVIEW 
 

E5      C#5     A5       B5    etc, etc../ 
IF HIS MIND IS PREHENSILE 
HE'LL PUT DOWN HIS PENCIL 
AND HAVE HIMSELF A SQUAT 
ON THE COSMIC UTENSIL 
GIVE IT ALL YOU GOT 
ON THE COSMIC UTENSIL 
SIT AND SPIN UNTIL YOU ROT 
ON THE COMIC UTENSIL 
HE REALLY NEEDS TO SQUAT 
ON THE COSMIC UTENSIL 
 
NOW THAT I GOT THAT OVER WITH 
ILL JUST PLAY MY IMAGINARY GUITAR 
AGAIN