I hope someone better than me can improve this.
The C -> B on "journal-oust" is very rough and needs improvement.
I think the C#m with the decending root sounds right, but I'm not sure.
Transcribing piano tunes on guitar is hard :(

asbestos_man_@hotmail.com

Song For Phil Daoust
by Tim Minchin

E (022100@1)                     AbThis (xx1114@1)is a song for Phil Daoust:

A (x02220@1)                C (x32010@1)     Boccasional (x2444x@1)Guardian Newspaper journal-oust.

E (022100@1)               AbI (xx1114@1)never ever ever mentioned your name,

A (x02220@1)                               Bor (x2444x@1)the review that you wrote, when I was new to this game.

C#m (x13321@4)                C#m/C
But now the time has come,

C#m/B                     C#m/Bb
I think I've dealt with my feelings at last.

F#mI (244222@1)really wanna forgive ya Phil,

B (x2444x@1)                            A (x02220@1)Byeah (x2444x@1)I wanna put the past in the past-a

E (022100@1)                AbOh (xx1114@1)and as this is such a big tour,

A (x02220@1)                           C (x32010@1) B (x2444x@1)I thought I outta take the opportunity.

E (022100@1)                         Ab'Cause (xx1114@1)there's a pretty good chance somebody out there will know you,

A (x02220@1)                        BMaybe (x2444x@1)they would pass on a message for me.

C#m (x13321@4)                C#m/C              C#m/B              C#m/Bb
Just wanna say, Phil Daoust, occasional Guardian Newspaper journal-oust,

F#mThat (244222@1)it's been three years since you wrote it,

Abmand (133111@4)time is very healing.

ABut (x02220@1)I still wanna cut big chunks of flesh out of your stupid face

Band (x2444x@1)make your children watch while I force you to eat them.

A (x02220@1)    BYeah (x2444x@1)I wanna make your children watch you eat your own face-meat.



E (022100@1)       BDing (x2444x@1)Dang Ding Dang Dong,

C#m (x13321@4)      AbmThis (133111@4)is my Phil Doust Song,

A (x02220@1)       EEverybody (022100@1)sing along,

ALa (x02220@1)la la la la la la,

B (x2444x@1)                              EI (022100@1)hope one of your family' members dies.

BPhil, (x2444x@1)Ding Dang Dong.

C#m (x13321@4)                 AbmI've (133111@4)written you this special song,

A (x02220@1)                 Eto (022100@1)help you get the attention -

A (x02220@1)        Byou (x2444x@1)obviously, desperately lack.



And I know that you're a smart man,
and with such a fine mind, I guess it has to be hard-
To resist throwing narcissistic, intellectual tantrums in the supermarket isles of 
your self-regard.

Just wanna say, Phil Daoust, I know it must be really hard to be a journal-oust.
While a deadlines always looming, and the pressure to be entertaining.
So maybe you should quit and get a job that you'd be better at - like killing 
yourself, you fucking cunt.

Ding Dang Ding Dang Dong,
This is my Phil Doust Song,
Everybody sing along,
Tra la la la la la la,
I hope something you love catches on fire.
Phil, Ding Dang Dong.
I've written you this special song,
to show how far I've come along -
in my efforts to be more mature in the face of negative feedback.

You fucking poo-face.